412: A New Eugenics... by Avon

Anew Genics

The TV was on, and as usual there was shite trying to sell me stuff. As usual I was not paying attention. As a nice break in the as-usuals Avon, the happy friendly skin care company, decided to get me thinking about the mass extermination of 'undesirables'. They did this by naming their new range of beautification creams (or whatever the hell it is, I couldn't really focus on any details about the actual product because of the crazy name they gave it) Anew Genics. A New Genics. An ewGenics.  Eugenics. Can someone please explain this to me, preferably someone from Avon.

The product is called Anew Genics. Firstly let's put aside the fact that it sounds like eugenics (you know, eugenics, the applied science of creating an homogeneous super-human race, historically by the extermination of entire races or social groups, or the forced sterilisation of anyone deemed unworthy to reproduce. You know, that thing that goes hand in hand with organised racism and genocide.), and just look at the two words: Anew and Genics.

Anew means again or in a new form. And Genics isn't even a word. Ok, genic is a word, meaning pertaining to genes, but is nonsense as a plural. What is it supposed to mean, pertainings to geneses? Someone in the Avon marketing department has decided they want to use the word Anew in a product name, but have been unable to come up with the rest. It's gone to committee and someone has thought I don't know why, but when I hear the word Anew I immediately think of Genics, it has a ring to it, doesn't it? Someone else has replied, yes, it reminds me of something but I can't think what. What does Genics mean anyway? I don't know, but it sounds like Genetics, and that's a real word, the sort of science-y word we like to use in our bullshit products, I mean beauty products.

The entire group of marketing feckers has settled on Anew Genics because it sounds kind of new-y and science-y, and reminds them of something that they can't quite place; it just sort of rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? This hypothesis leaves the collected twats at Avon marketing as unqualified idiots, ignorant to the nuances and tricks of the English language.

That's one hypothesis. There is another, much more sinister one. In the second hypothesis the marketing team did not start with the word Anew and work from there. They started with the word Eugenics and worked out a way of making it sound like a beauty product. They actively wanted the association of their skin cream with a systematic programme of eradicating difference and imperfection in the human species. They fantasise about a future in which the upper echelons of Avon hierarchy have final and absolute control over the way we look, think, smell and speak. (Remember this is just a hypothesis, I'm not saying it's true. It might be true, but it might not be. And even if it is what they want, that doesn't mean they can pull it off.)

So Avon's Anew Genics was borne from either idiocy, or fascism. Either way, it's fecking stupid.